


The Terrible moustache™

by malazuzu22



Series: Kakashi's and Yamato's not so ordinary (mis)adventures [4]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Anbu Hatake Kakashi, Anbu Yamato | Tenzou, Awkward facial hair, Dating, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, Geez those tags are so bad, Kakashi can't grow a beard for the love of god, Kohai behaving bad, M/M, On the mission together, Senpai needs to punish him, Senpai-Kouhai Relationship, Teasing, Tenzo can't be really blamed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-12-08 15:48:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11649753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malazuzu22/pseuds/malazuzu22
Summary: Kakashi and Tenzo are sent on a mission together to the Land of Water. Long missions, lack of mirrors and no razors don't mix well with the infamous Copy Ninja. Upon discovering that, Tenzo can't stop laughing at his captain. Disrespect needs to be punished accordingly.Not much plot really, half of the text is just smut. You've been warned.(It still fascinates me how hard is to write a short summary... :D)IMPORTANT UPDATE - don't forget to see the fanart made by wilhelminafae (link in notes), you won't regret it. :D :D





	The Terrible moustache™

**Author's Note:**

> Placed a few months after 'There's no way...'. The boys are together, Kakashi is still in ANBU. Tenzo is 19, Kakashi is 23.
> 
> Brief explanation of the codenames:  
> Tenzo's codename - Matsunoki = pine tree  
> Kakashi's codename - Nekomaru - neko = cat; -maru is quite common end of japanese names (that much you already know I suppose)
> 
> Chronological order of the stories:  
> part 2 - Tenzo's hair  
> part 1 - There's no way he would love me  
> part 5 - Making it work  
> part 4 - The Terrible moustache™  
> part 3 - How exactly (not) to come out

It was a routine mission in the Land of Water Sarutobi-sama appointed them with. Sandaime got a word from their ANBU operating in the land there had been several disappearances of the villagers on one of the smaller islands and all the details implied it might be Orochimaru’s shady business behind them. The hokage sent ANBU to deal with the problem before it would cause a quarrel with the Kirigakure.

 

Tenzo left Konoha with Kakashi before dawn. There were just the two of them. Less people would slip into the country under the Kiri ANBU attention much easier and they didn’t want to cause any ruckus. The mission objective was to investigate the source of disappearances and if it indeed involved Konoha rogue ninjas, erase all the evidence. If the possibility arose, Orochimaru was to be captured and brought into the village alive.

It took them several days to travel to the island as ship they needed to take only sailed there two times a week. Arriving finally to the destination, disguised as common travellers, the pair aimed for the local inn to get the accomodation for themselves.

 

‘Good evening, good sirs! May I help you?’ The jolly round-faced innkeeper hurried towards them the second they set the foot into the reception room. ‘I hope so. We would like to rent a room.’ Kakashi stepped forward. ‘Ah! Certainly. Although I only have rooms for two available, the single ones are all full. If it’s not a problem.’ The innkeeper rubbed his hands nervously.

‘Maa. We’ll manage, ne, _Matsunoki_?’ Kakashi turned to him with a cheeky smile. Tenzo pressed his lips together for a second to swallow the rising urge to slap him. A pine tree. Of course he would come up with some ridiculous codename again. Well, two could play this game.

‘Sure, it’s perfectly acceptable, _Nekomaru_.’ Tenzo smiled back, relishing at the way Kakashi’s eyes narrowed in indignation for a split of the second. As a typical dog person, Kakashi didn’t like cats at all. ‘Splendid! Follow me please, gentlemen!’ The innkeeper however didn’t notice anything strange and motioned them to follow him up the stairs.

 

‘Here’s the room.’ He unlocked the door at the end of the hallway on the second floor. ‘I would almost forget. How long do you wish to stay? Through the entire duration of the Jellyfish festival?’ The innkeeper inquired. ‘Eh, yes please.’ Kakashi answered promptly. A Jellyfish festival? No one told them about that but it explained no one deemed their arrival as suspicious.

‘Then welcome to your home for the next four days. My wife is running the inn joined to the dorms, do not hesitate to come for meal. Or if you want some privacy, you can have the meal delivered there as well.’ The man was talking mile a minute, attentive host he was.

‘We are a bit worn out after our journey. May we ask for the dinner to be brought here?’ Tenzo requested politely. ‘Certainly, sire. I’ll have someone fetch it in… Half an hour?’ The innkeeper estimated. ‘That would be perfect, thank you.’ Tenzo nodded and the round man hurried away, leaving them alone at last.

 

‘Chatty little fellow. He could have some information.’ Kakashi commented when they closed the door behind them. The room was decorated sparsely but quite tastefully, a huge bed for two dominating it. There was a small bathroom joined to it and a balcony.

‘We can head down to the inn later to gather some intel. Drunk men spill the secrets quite easily.’ Tenzo padded over to the left side of the bed, taking his coat off on the way. ‘I reserve the first round of shower!’ Kakashi exclaimed childishly, shrugging his clothing down as well. ‘Unless you want to join me, of course.’ He wiggled his silver brows. Tenzo snorted at his poor attempts to flirt.

‘Someone needs to answer the door and sharing a shower with you would take forever. Off you go.’ The brunet laughed and waved the other man off. ‘As you wish.’ Kakashi commented with nose up in mock-offended grimace and disappeared in the bathroom.

 

 

While he was enjoying the shower – and Tenzo didn’t want to think what else than getting clean was Kakashi doing in there considering he almost certainly heard several whimpers and _his name_ being moaned, no doubt intentionally to make him flustered  – Tenzo sorted through the information they obtained.

The meal arrived shortly before Kakashi emerged out of the mist of steam coming out of the bathroom. ‘You did leave some warm water for me, didn’t you?’ Tenzo asked cautiously. ‘A bit?’ Kakashi ventured with apologetic gesture, making his kohai sigh deeply. ‘Typical.’ The brunet pursed his lips in annoyance.

 

‘Let’s eat first before the meal gets cold. I’ll take a shower after that.’ Tenzo sat down on the floor, behind the little table filled with bowls. The mokuton user took a bowl filled with rich fish soup and some bread and dug in happily before Kakashi joined him, eyes trained on the parchment with mission information to remember them all.

‘Enjoy your meal.’ He lifted his eyes to send Kakashi a smile but froze immediately when his sight fell on the now exposed Copy nin’s face. ‘Is something wrong?’ Kakashi paused on munching and tilted his head. Tenzo lifted his jaw from where it dropped on the floor and snapped his mouth shut audibly, wide eyes fixed firmly on the skin above Kakashi’s upper lip.

 

‘What on earth is _that_?’ He managed after a few seconds of stunned silence. ‘What do you mean?’ Kakashi’s brows furrowed in confusion. ‘That thing under your nose.’ Tenzo finally recovered from the initial shock and the corners of his mouth twitched wildly. He had to bite his tongue to keep himself from bursting out laughing.

‘Oh man. My facial hair already reached the point of awkwardness, huh?’ Kakashi’s shoulders slumped down in resignation and his face twisted into a picture of pure misery. Tenzo couldn’t hold it any longer and the guffaws of laughter finally made their way out, accompanied by hands flailing and slapping his thigh.

 

‘Are you quite done?’ Kakashi watched him with unimpressed glower, chin propped on his palm, drumming his fingers on the table. ‘Sorry I…’ A myriad of giggles escaping his lungs interrupted the apology and Kakashi rolled his eyes long-sufferingly. ‘Huh. I’m fine. I’m cool, I’m fine.’ Tenzo took several deep breaths to contain himself and looked at Kakashi again.

‘I’m really sorry but… Whatever poor excuse for a moustache this is, it’s incredibly ridiculous.’ Tenzo waved vaguely in the general direction of Kakashi’s face, wiping a tear of laugher from the corner of his eye. ‘No kidding.’ Kakashi grumbled sullenly, focused on attacking his food with the spoon.

 

‘Saa, I’m sorry senpai. It wasn’t very nice of me.’ Tenzo bit the inside of his cheek to maintain a sincere expression, reaching across the table to squeeze Kakashi’s hand. ‘I can’t really blame you I suppose. If it was the other way around I’d have a ball right now.’ Kakashi shrugged, peering at him through his dark grey lashes, a small smile spreading over his face as well.

‘I don’t doubt that for a second. And you would tell the whole ANBU squad on top of that.’ Tenzo snorted dryly. ‘You bet I would. It’s a real shame you look absolutely dashing when your stubble grows. Oh wait, it’s not and I love it.’ Kakashi pressed his lips to Tenzo’s wrist. ‘Saa, you’re exaggerating…’ Tenzo blushed deeply. Accepting compliments from Kakashi was still tough for him, no matter they were dating for several months now.

 

 

‘Maa, just say thanks and don’t try to brush it off. You’re handsome and that’s a fact. And it’s all mine.’ Kakashi smiled, apparently very much satisfied with himself he managed to bring Tenzo even deeper into the state of utter frustration. ‘Senpaaaai…’ Tenzo ducked his head, cheeks burning.

‘What, do you want me to demonstrate it to you just how much I appreciate it?’ A tongue swept across the pulse point on Tenzo’s wrist where the Copy nin previously placed the kiss. ‘I didn’t take a shower yet, I’m all filthy and…’ Tenzo blurted out, snatching his hand back.

‘As if I ever had a problem with you being filthy.’ Kakashi grinned wolfishly and crawled towards Tenzo, fixing him with eyes full of lust. Tenzo wanted to reprimand he should keep the sharingan closed but was promptly cut off by thin lips stealing a searing kiss.

 

He could feel the anticipation brewing in his belly, slowly sending waves down into his crotch, only something halted his mind thinking of all the things he would like to do to the silver-haired man. More specifically, the tickling sensation on his face.

Realizing it had to be that terrible moustache, a chuckle escaped Tenzo’s lips entirely on its own. ‘What?’ Kakashi backed away a little, wearing a puzzled expression. Seeing that awful patch of hair under Kakashi’s nose from such a close proximity, Tenzo couldn’t fight another fit of hysterical giggles from bursting out.

 

‘It’s… O-oh kami. It’s ti-tickling me.’ Tenzo explained between the guffaws, wiping at his tearing eyes again. Kakashi sat on his heels with sour expression, clearly conveying how much done he was right now. ’We’ve been through this a few minutes ago. I can’t help it how my facial hair grows.’ He threw the arms up in exasperation.

‘I really don’t mean to upset you, but I can’t… It looks so much worse up close. I’m so sorry, Kakashi…’ Tenzo kept chuckling and leaned forward to caress the moping Copy nin’s cheek. ‘Yeah, yeah. So as long as I have this thing on my face, I can’t even kiss you without being laughed at. What did I ever do to deserve this.’ Kakashi grumbled and ducked away from the touch.

 

‘Kakashi, please. I don’t want to mock you. Don’t be mad at me.’ Tenzo scrambled to his knees and embraced the Copy nin, pecking his nose and cheeks with smacking kisses. ‘I’m not… Well I am a little.’ Kakashi deflated, melting into the embrace with every obtained kiss.

 

‘Shave it.’ His senpai blurted out. ‘Eh?’ Tenzo backed away to look at him questioningly, palms resting on his shoulders. ‘I can’t do it myself, there’s no mirror in the bathroom. You have to shave it for me.’ Kakashi repeated himself, eyes averted to the side and sucking on his lower lip.

‘Are you sure you trust me with that?’ Tenzo asked carefully. It was after all against the very nature of the shinobi to let anyone even remotely close to them with anything sharp. There was a long pause before Kakashi spoke up again. ‘Yes. If there’s anyone in the world I can trust, it’s you.’ The Copy nin nodded slowly.

‘I’d rather gave up my own life than let anyone hurt you, much less doing it myself.’ Tenzo cupped Kakashi’s cheeks and pressed their foreheads together. ‘You know what would hurt me the most? You dying. So don’t you fucking dare.’ Kakashi frowned momentarily before his expression softened.

 

‘Kami, do it already, I want to ravish you so badly.’ The silver-haired man plucked a kunai from his pocket and handed it over to Tenzo. ‘Alright, sit down properly.’ Tenzo prompted as he repositioned so he was sitting cross-legged, facing Kakashi who followed the suit.

‘Don’t move. You keep all of your kunai exceptionally sharp, I’d hate to cut off your lip if you twitch. I’m rather fond of it.’ Tenzo instructed and readjusted his grip on the blade. Kakashi froze in his position, only his eyes were widening comically as the blade neared his face.

‘That’s it, steady.’ Tenzo murmured with reassuring voice, attempting to calm him down. All the instincts must have been rebelling inside the Copy nin against it but he remained still. With a few careful wipes of the blade all the traces of the sparse silver moustache were gone. ‘All done. That’s my handsome senpai.’ Tenzo announced and set the weapon away.

 

 

Kakashi released a relieved breath he was holding the whole time. ‘Kami, that was intense. My whole mind screamed to run.’ His senpai admitted, scratching behind his ear. ‘Though it didn’t hurt in the end.’ Tenzo smiled, dusting the bits of silver hair off Kakashi’s black trousers.

‘So. You won’t laugh anymore now it’s gone?’ Kakashi bared his pearly white teeth in impish grin. ‘Try me.’ Tenzo answered with a matching one that morphed into a bubble of laughter when Kakashi launched himself on him, sending them rolling on the floor.

 

‘You little minx. I’ll show you the dire consequences of making fun of your captain.’ Kakashi managed to pin Tenzo under himself, holding his wrists above his head. ‘I know I was a bad kohai and I'm ashamed. I take whatever punishment you have for me.’ Tenzo played along without batting an eyelash.

 

 

Something feral glinted in Kakashi’s eyes before he proceeded to kiss the hell out of Tenzo. As soon as their lips met, he demanded the entrance and Tenzo parted his lips willingly to let the Copy nin’s tongue in. While they usually battled for dominance, Tenzo played his role of submissive kohai this time.

Abandoning the hold on his wrists with his right hand, Kakashi slipped it under his kohai’s shirt to roam over the toned abs of his stomach and chest. Tenzo moaned audibly when his nipple was pinched harshly. Kakashi groaned in response and tugged the fabric up impatiently, allowing Tenzo to sit up so they could strip him of the annoying piece of garment.

 

While Tenzo fought his shirt off, Kakashi got rid of his own. The second they were both half naked, their flesh met in passionate embrace, hands exploring every last inch of the skin while Kakashi kissed his way along Tenzo’s jawline and down onto his neck.

There he bit down and sucked on the spot to lessen the pain. Tenzo couldn’t help but keep releasing loud moans, feeling pain mixed with pleasure waving through his body. Kakashi abruptly stood up, dragging Tenzo with himself with a firm grip on his biceps.

 

‘Bed, now.’ He commanded curtly, pushing Tenzo backwards to their destination while he worked on his buttoned trousers. It didn’t seem to obey so he just ripped the button off impatiently and as Tenzo’s legs bumped into the bed behind him, Kakashi pushed him roughly onto it and yanked them off his kohai along with his boxers.

Stripping out of his pants as well – no underwear again, what a surprise – Kakashi crawled up the bed to kneel above the brunet, his arousal obviously painfully hard. _‘He must really like this little game.’_ Tenzo smirked to himself. ‘Ah. What are you going to do to me, senpai?’ Tenzo adopted an expression of innocence.

‘I’ll make you feel sorry.’ Kakashi growled, leaning down to leave another dark mark on Tenzo’s collarbone while his left hand wrapped around Tenzo’s cock and started jerking him off. Tenzo’s hands snuck around Kakashi’s torso on their own accord, short nails digging into the skin of the Copy nin’s back to accompany particularly loud groans and hopefully leaving some scratch marks.

 

 

When he was content with the marks he left on his lover, Kakashi gripped Tenzo’s shoulder tightly to make him sit up. ‘You know, what to do. Suck it, kohai.’ Kakashi ordered, watching Tenzo’s reaction intently. The brunet did exactly what he was told, sucking and licking the way he knew would drive Kakashi crazy, pumping the rest of his cock with his palm.

The sighs and groans escaping Kakashi’s lips were growing louder and more frequent as Tenzo sucked harder and with even more fervour. Pale fingers tangled into the mess of brown hair were pulling almost painfully and Kakashi was visibly restraining himself from thrusting and possibly causing Tenzo to choke.

 

‘Tenzo…’ He breathed out, already panting, a sign he was nearing his peak. Apparently not wanting to come just yet, the Copy nin pulled out of Tenzo’s mouth with a wet pop. ‘Lower left pocket.’ He gestured towards the backpack left by the bedside. Tenzo leaned over the bed to retrieve the bottle of lube undoubtedly stored in there and handed it over to Kakashi obediently.

The older man didn’t waste any time and squeezed a generous portion of the clear substance onto his fingers, immediately reaching down to circle Tenzo’s entrance before he pushed two fingers into the ring of muscles. Tenzo gripped the bedsheets tightly and hissed in pain but Kakashi leaned down to distract him with another heated kiss.

 

The Copy nin swallowed the moan Tenzo released when his lover crossed the fingers inside of him and added the third finger to stretch him even more. When he deemed Tenzo sufficiently prepared so he wouldn’t hurt him, Kakashi pulled his fingers out to coat himself with the lube. Tenzo immediately missed the pressure inside him and made impatient sound.

Gripping him tightly around the waist, Kakashi turned him abruptly onto his stomach. ‘On your knees.’ Tenzo was ordered and without hesitation he obeyed. One of Kakashi’s hands clutched Tenzo’s hip and with the other he guided himself in.

 

 

Kakashi prepared him well but still Tenzo’s breath hitched when the tip of his lover’s cock entered him. The Copy nin gave a few shallow thrusts to help him accommodate to the stretch and noticing Tenzo’s wordless nod of consent, Kakashi buried himself in as much as he could, drawing a sharp moan out of the brunet as he hit the sweet spot.

He pulled out slowly, leaving just the head of his cock in his lover, only to thrust in not so gently, encouraging Tenzo to meet the movement with the hands on his hips. And then again. And again. Tenzo was seeing stars with every hit on his prostate, moaning without regard whether anyone could hear or not.

 

Kakashi was fucking him hard, their flesh meeting with loud smacks and Tenzo felt like he was in heaven. His nostrils were filled with the smell his own sweat mixed with his lover’s and with Kakashi’s unique scent of ozone. When he dared to sneak a peek at him, Kakashi’s head was thrown back, biting on his lower lips and eyes clenched shut.

After a while Tenzo could hear Kakashi’s laboured breathing and his thrusts became a bit erratic, a testament the Copy nin was nearing his release. Tenzo too felt his underbelly tighten with the accumulated pleasure and reached down to ease the pressure in his neglected cock.

 

Kakashi swatted his hand immediately away, wrapping his own slim fingers around Tenzo’s member. ‘Who’s your senpai?’ Kakashi bent over to whisper into his ear, licking on the earlobe. Tenzo only managed a particularly loud moan. ‘I want to hear it. Who’s your senpai?’ Kakashi exchanged the lick for a bite.

‘A-ah! You-you are!’ Tenzo stammered out between the thrusts. ‘You belong to me, yes?’ Kakashi growled possessively. ‘O-of course, sen-pai.’ The brunet nodded frantically. ‘And you will obey whatever I tell you.’ The Copy nin continued their little game of power. ‘Yes, s-senpai!’ Tenzo cried out when Kakashi tightened his hold on his member.

‘Then come for me. Scream my name.’ A few jerky tugs on his cock accompanied with thrusts hitting the prostate with deadly precision brought Tenzo over and his orgasm washed over him like a tsunami wave. ‘Aaah, Kakashi!’ White strands of his release stained the bedsheets and Kakashi’s hand and Tenzo fought to stay propped on his hands instead of collapsing onto the bed.

 

 

Sensing the weakness of his limbs through the tremors of his orgasm, Kakashi wrapped his hand around Tenzo’s chest to support him up, never mind smearing the milky substance all over his torso in the process. ‘Oh, kami! I love you, Tenzo!’ Kakashi cried out as he found his peak as well, filling his kohai with the result of his climax.

Easing them both with a few lazy thrusts, Kakashi pulled his softening cock out and collapsed on top of Tenzo, whose arms finally gave away under him. Hearing the grunt Tenzo produced, Kakashi rolled a bit to the side, head resting on Tenzo’s shovel blade and arm draped lazily around his waist, legs tangled. Both of them were silent, trying to catch their breath again.

 

 

‘That. That was awesome. I love you too by the way.’ Tenzo mumbled into his pillow when he trusted his voice to work again. ‘You are awesome. And you are mine.’ Kakashi tightened his hold on him and planted a sloppy kiss onto his back. ‘Although you should definitely get that shower now.’ He snorted, making Tenzo chuckle weakly in response.

‘I suppose. Care to help me out?’ The brunet offered playfully. ‘Uh la la. Up for another round? And here I was thinking I already fucked the hell out of you.’ Kakashi sat up and dragged Tenzo into the bathroom with great enthusiasm.

 

 

Halfway through their second round against the wall Kakashi’s shriek of shock could be undoubtedly heard even in the hallway when the water pouring on their entwined bodies suddenly turned cold. ‘Serves you well for using all the hot water. Now shut up and finish what you started.’ Tenzo laughed in satisfaction and Kakashi didn’t hesitate to make his wish come true.

 

₪₪₪

 

Needless to say, they didn’t manage to capture Orochimaru during that mission as he already left the island, leaving behind just a few of his subordinates. With the exception of two the villagers were found alive in the hideout and Kakashi used genjutsu to make them forget what happened.

 

Although their mission didn’t end up with complete success, they remembered spending their time together at the Jellyfish festival with fondness. Their depart from the inn involved cheeky winks from the innkeeper, sincere wishes of good luck _‘because you are so cute together!’_ from his wife and lots of blushing on Tenzo’s part. Kakashi just kept grinning impishly.

**Author's Note:**

> Oh my god, how did I even write this. *runs and hides under the rock, giggling like a teen*
> 
> For the record, imagine that awful moustache [like this](https://s3.amazonaws.com/rapgenius/justin-620JPG-2261654.jpg) (*≧∀≦*)
> 
> IMPORTANT UPDATE - my awesome and brilliant Mina did a sketch of Kakashi sporting that horrid thing. Pure genius. You have to see it! [There's the treasure](https://malazuzu22.tumblr.com/post/163690004526/the-terrible-moustache)


End file.
